I was eating with my grandparents and i couldn’t get this one thought out of my head. francis chan says that we give God only scraps and that the amount of money we make is way above the world average. since i’m going to have a job here and all my housing is being provided for, i started to think: what would happen if i gave all of my salary to church? It quickly became a fantasy, thinking that possibly God would take me on such a great adventure if i were able to do this. but then it quickly faded into worry. i realized that i was only willing to trust God if i felt capable of dealing with a situation. if i need food, i could just go eat with the staff. housing is already dealt with so i dont need to spend anything on that. i could easily do without extra spending. but i thought about it and i definitely need money to go places. if i gave all of my money how would i get around. so i sat there in the restaurant just scared out of my mind. it feels like God wants me to do this, give him every last penny. but i guess i dont trust him. i guess you honestly do have to be crazy.

but now that i sit back and look at it. i could be overreacting. if im going to listen to God i should sit and really listen. quiet myself down and stop reacting every time i feel convicted. either way there’s always two sides, i can never figure out which is correct until the last second.